I got into an argument with someone last night and it's been with me ever since. I think it might be a while before we speak again. She's actually mad at me, while I'm just frustrated with her. I handled things badly, but I wasn't wrong just a little more sharp (okay maybe a lot) than was neccessary. You see I graduated from school last June. I worked very hard had little to no help and earned my grades. This person is smart but acts dumb (Reason #1 for frustration) she is not dumb she is lazy! (Reason #2) And stubborn and never admits a mistake. Never! After I graduated from college she went back to school to get her degree. Yay her, right? Well every single class she has taken she has asked for help, used my body of work to jump start her papers and once, that I know, of slapped her name on something that was 100% completely mine. After that happened I told myself I would no longer help her because she was totally in the wrong. She still doesn't see what the big deal is. She told me that last night, turning in my work as her own is no big deal, why am I upset about this?
So last night's argument? She called me and asked me to write 200 words for her discussion questions because "she had a bad day" and "she wants to just go to bed" I told that I didn't know how to say this without sounding like a bitch but No. She told me I was being a bitch and that I was selfish blah blah blah. And then she said that she would do it for me (yeah the difference is I would never and didn't ever ask anyone to do my work for me) So I completely lost my cool (which I regret) and went off in way that really the situation didn't warrant. I didn't really realize how bothered I was by her previous actions until she called me selfish for basically standing up for myself. It would have been much easier to have written up the 200 words than to have gone through everything last night. I made her cry and got mad at myself for being so upset about the whole thing. I slept like crap because I couldn't really get over it. On a positive note, I didn't take to eating. I stayed completely out of the kitchen.
I just don't know how to fix it, because while the yelling was wrong, I am not wrong. I earned my degree by myself and so should she. And I do know she had a bad day, but I also know that 90% of that bad day was her own fault. So, I'm left frustrated and a little bit sad. It's a huge mess.
3 comments:
If it would make you feel better, you could call her and apologize for your loss of temper. I agree with you though, that there is nothing selfish about doing what is right. She should feel ashamed that she has used your work to cheat, and wanted you to knowingly cheat for her.
If it were me, I wouldn't apologize to her. She needs to grow up and take responsibility for her actions. Good for you for not writing HER work. I would have gone off on her too. You did your time in school. If she wants a degree, she has to earn it. Gah.
Sorry, that probably doesn't help much. Lazy people frustrate me especially when they are smart and they take advantage of friends. She should be apologizing to you.
maybe you shouldn't have yelled - but I'd have been tempted to kick her in the shins! Cheating is never right. I am quite impressed that you found the strength to say no. You clearly have a lot of integrity. You were in the right. It is easy to see how frustration could have taken over the conversation.
My 2 cents worth: apologize for yelling if it is really bothering you - but please don't be sorry for not helping her cheat. She won't get far in life if she doesn't learn now how to do it herself.
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