Lazy Day Sunday? Nope Not me.

So yesterday was disappointing on many levels. I didn't see the numbers on the scale I wanted to, I didn't drink enough water, and I attended a SLU girls Basketball game and ate concession food. I no longer have any Flex points for the week. That's how many points I managed to consume in one evening.

But it's okay, because today is a new day. I woke up early and went to church with my family, and we did not go out to breakfast afterward. And this afternoon I went to the gym and worked out hard. I actually ran. Well maybe more of a fast jog and I didn't last very long about a 1/4 of a mile but that's like waaay more than I've done before. I'm more of a walker. My sister is the runner. She was there at the gym too and she brought my Mom with her! My Mom is really good at the dieting part of losing weight but has never embraced the exercise. And she needs it desperately, so I was really happy to see her there. I'm hoping she will make it a habit. It would be great to go to the gym and have workout partners there. It gets lonely going by myself.

After the gym, I headed over to the grocery store to pick up a few staples that I need for my lunches this week. I was out of turkey meat and low on bread, and I'm going to bring salad with me this week as well. So I needed a cucumber. It felt really good to get in the grocery store and not be tempted by anything bad. Maybe I should remember to workout everytime before I head to the grocery store.

Tonight, I am going to a class offered by my church called Financial Peace University. 2009 is all about getting b alance in my life again. I've been working on my health and now I'm goign to figure out the money piece and maybe after that I'll be able to tackle the social aspect of my life. It's completely non-existant and has been for quite sometime. I really believe this is my year to figure out me. Give me time, I'm going to work really hard.

Summer 2008

So the whole process of being healthier this summer was a rousing success in some areas and a total failure in others. I have managed to gain an additional 15 lbs to my already large frame. This makes me sad and little bit stressed and unsure what my next step is going to be. How can I eat healthy and still gain weight? It puts in such a frustrated state that I end up grabbing the cookies, brownies, whatever is at hand and chow down. I also start to resign myself to being fat and head to the nearest fast food place. I have sucha defeatist attitude these days and I do not know how to get past this so I can make some actual progress. I really think I need to head back to WW meetings. At least there I received motivation from strangers. I sure as hell am not getting any help from my family. Secretly, I think they all derive pleasure from having someone on the familly fatter than they are.

My daughter at least is finding success in high school. She has PE everyday and her teacher works them hard. H has already lost about 3 lbs. Her shirts look better on her and her jeans are looser. I'm so proud of her and hope she can lose the 10 lbs she really needs to lose.

Now for my success. I wanted to do three things this year, lose weight, graduate, and stop smoking. As noted above, weight loss has been a bust, but I did graduate in June and *drumroll* I stopped smoking in July! It has been such a challenge and sometimes I think I'm still going to fail at this, but so far everyday since July 18th, I have said NO. I can breathe better, walk upstairs without becoming out of breathe, my hair does not smell, and I know my lungs are healing.

So while I haven't found the right path for my weight loss yet, I have managed to succeed in becoming one step closer to being healthy. I still have 4 months left of this year to do something. I'll try to keep updates here more current, maybe if I can find success in weight loss I'll actually follow through with my postings.